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You WON'T Believe What Some People Do During Brazillians

6 October, 2019 - 02:15pm by - First Lady | 15 Comments

 

Dear Client,

I am your Beauty Therapist.  I tackle the areas of your body that you dislike or are uncomfortable with and hopefully you leave my salon feeling beautiful and confident.

Now I know any job in the beauty industry seems glamourous, but let me tell you the truth.  Behind the smile and the chit chat lie long hours, a low-end pay scale and customer service so full on it's exhausting.  When I return home to MR B.T I often have to take myself in the bedroom to decompress from the conversations I've had.  Salacious gossip.  Truly heartbreaking personal problems.  TMI to levels that would make even the most bawdy lass cringe. 

Another thing I know is that often my clients are very self-conscious about coming in for certain treatments.  Like the infamous Brazilian.  And I totally get it - other than your partner, doctor or midwife, your lady areas should remain private right?  Afterall, a lady reveals nothing. 

Unfortunately for us Beauty Therapists, some ladies reveal more than anyone would want to see.

Let me preface my secret-spill-all by say vagina schmagina.  Bikini waxing is my most popular procedure - I don't bat an eyelid at the mooey.  I see a lady garden that needs pruning and I prune it.  I've waxed family members and best friends, and guess what, I can still look them in the eye.

And yet every so often I deal with a client who makes a Brazilian just a little less pleasant.

Poo-nani.

I always offer full service to my clients - no one wants the rear-view of their bikini to let them down right?  Well one regular client brings a whole new meaning to the word skidmark. Ladies, the saying is wipe from front to back, not wipe onto the back.  Or indeed the treatment bed.

Aunt Flo.

If there's one thing that unites all women it's that monthly visit from Aunt Flo.  But here's a tip ladies - hot wax and a tampon string do not make for a comfortable bikini wax.

And speaking of Aunt Flo - please do not dispose of your used sanitary protection in one of our  pristine white fluffy towels.  Please.

Wash.  Please wash.

Did you mean to leave that piece of tissue paper in that spot?  Just like you would a midday smear test, freshen up before your appointment.  Please!  Please! 

And when I offer you our wipes, please use them.  And dispose of them in the bin clearly provided.  Do not leave them on the floor, bench or worse, my clean counter top.

Oh, and, there's one thing a quick wash or a wipe will not solve...please save any amorous activity until AFTER the wax.  Seriously.  Ick.

Wee, Wee, Wee, All the way home.

Weak pelvic floor exercises are a curse to many a woman.  And they shouldn't hold you back.  Empty your bladder just before your wax (and note the previous point) and advise your therapist so she can lay an extra towel down. 

Although, if it helps, I was once waxing my bestie who peed on me.  And we're still friends. 

 

I will finish this diatribe by saying I am of course talking about the minority, the majority of clients (like you, I'm sure) would never commit these CABs. (Crimes Against Beauticians).

And so, until next time, I will sign off this edition of Salon stories you won't believe with three ominous words.

To be continued...

Your Beauty Therapist.

xox

 

*The experiences in this article are from a qualified Beauty Therapist. The experiences she has reported are real.  Her name has been hidden to protect the identity of herself, her salon and mostly, her clients.  Innocent or otherwise.

 

Comments

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18th October, 2019

Sorry had to laugh especially at the way it was written. But seriously though some of those come down to just pure hygiene ewww lol.

14th October, 2019

Hahahaha this is hilarious,thanks so much for making my day :)

10th October, 2019

Oh my lord.. one job I couldn’t do

9th October, 2019

I waxed someone who had poo dags and smelt bad. Lots came from working out and didn't freshen up but most of the time things were okay.

7th October, 2019

Hahahaha totally enjoyed this story ;D

7th October, 2019

That's so gross!

7th October, 2019

Ewwww, nasty.

7th October, 2019

I think it's not until you deal with the public that you realize just how gross some people are

7th October, 2019

This was a fantastic read! Lol! Too funny

7th October, 2019

Omg this poor lady! Seems like some people just have no humility at all! Gross lol

7th October, 2019

Seems like a very unpleasant job

6th October, 2019

Ewww.....a lot of this could come down to basic manners, hygiene and some common sense.

6th October, 2019

Wow thats some stories wot a experience to stick to you for life.

6th October, 2019

Eeee I just could not do it ....

6th October, 2019

i had a wax before birthing the madam, god i hate those paper gstrings they give you. so uncomfortable! and do they have to wax so CLOSELY to your sensitive lady bits! sure, i asked for an extended bikini wax but i'd like my bits to stay there, thanks! ahh the joys

MareeB
6th October, 2019

I admire your bravery girl!

shazatron101
6th October, 2019

Hahaha not sure about bravery, not braining more like

tabucutie
7th October, 2019

I get waxed regularly but have not heard the term an extended bikini wax. What is that?

shazatron101
7th October, 2019

Its a bikini wax but more... inwards lol