How to change habits of a lifetime.....FRUSTRATED!

Kia ora beautiful ladies, so I am on an uphill battle to try and lose weight and ultimately be happy in my own skin.  It seems like an almost impossible task to break the habits of a lifetime so I am asking a couple of questions to get some advice.
What do you girls do to stay fit and healthy without starving yourself?  And secondly how do you change habits that I have alway had like having bread and it doesn't help vegemite toast is my fave food in the wide world.  I need to train my mind to not crave bread so much.....help? :(

Shana I lost 30kg in 360 days with MyFitnessPal (other calorie programmes work fine too) & for the most part its stayed off (except the few kg I put on post-injury!)

It wasn't hard... I gave nothing up, & i still use it 18 months later to keep an eye on my weight :)

Hi Shana,
I've been using myfitnesspal (calorie counting app) as well. I have lost 6.5kg over the last 7 weeks.
I find it really good because I am really bad with serving sizes. I take it as I can still eat whatever I want but if I want the extra biscuits or I want to eat McDonalds then I'm going to have to do some extra exercise to be able to fit it in. So that way if I don't want to do exercise then I will just have to eat extra healthy that day. Everything in moderation! Then one day a week I have a cheat meal and I can eat whatever I want. So if I want to go to the pub and have the roast with gravy or I want to eat some pizza I do (I still try and eat less but I'm just happy not to cut it all out).
That is what works for me! But remember everyone is different so don't beat yourself up over it and make sure that you are still enjoying life because that is what it is all about.

Frustrating alright!! I have no will power these days and I think a lot of my weight issues is from when I have to have an eating disorder when I was a teen. I also think my own hormones play havoc on my metabolism, its a bit of an uphill battle but I'm #stillplumpbuthappy :)

Whenever I want to lose weight I just cut out all sugar from my diet. I try to increase my activity levels ie walk around a bit more at work, go to the bathroom more frequently (to check on your makeup, duh! Unless you drink heaps of water and have to pee every ten minutes.. That also helps! Hahaha... it also increases your activity level to walk to the bathroom a couple of times instead of once or twice during your work day)... Take an alternative route to your destination, maybe somewhere with steps instead of a walkway? It's the simplest things that all add up in the end.... 

I find having a meet up with a friend and going exercising with her once or twice a week helps keep me going. I also try and exercise on other days as well but exercising with her means the time goes a little faster and I'm pushing my self a little more.

Over the last two years Lost about ten kilos. Drink lots of water. 30 minutes exercise whether it be walks or homeworkouts. Mornings could be eggs/cereal/smoothies and lunches salads/wraps, dinners 1 protein and handful of veges.Fruit and Nuts for in between snacks. No bread, No pasta , no rice. Helped me drop it. I have a cheat meal every sundays . Seeing this thread reminds that I need to get back into it. Even though I'm not on it I stay away from bread. Its so hard too.

Great advice thank you all.  I must look in to a fitnesspal!  I can't do no bread but maybe I can have two bread a day with vegemite of course :)  I go to the gym once a week because I am so rural and walk twice a week about 3 km but it seems like not enough.

I too love vegemite on toast in the morning!!! omnomonm

Good on shana! I forgot to put the damn marmite in my groceries too. It's looking stormy here. I'm a bit scared to go back out. 

It's hard going alright, I wish you all the best. I've just started trying some essential oils to help me - fingers crossed. If I have any success I'll post about it.

Great thanks Mareebros would be interesting to see how you get on :)

Hey hun, changing eating habits is such a hard thing to do but it is possible! For me it was easier for me to change one thing at a time instead of going cold turkey, drink plenty of water, and most importantly dont starve yourself! You can have a diet when you eat alot and your never hungry and lose weight, i hope it works out for you hun, any help just Facebook me, xxx

Hey gf I can sympathise with your situation all too well.  I struggle with weightloss too. Pre children/babies I was at my lightest and happiest within myself. I am determined to get there. For me... I TRY to drink 3 litres of water a day (I have a water app on my phone to help remind me) I try to avoid white bread. Sub it with vogels or tortilla wraps or lettuce. I do zumba once a week (working up to 3 then 5 days a week). It's also a lot of common sense. I don't avoid treating my self and I don't go over board with what I do treat myself with. I'm taking the approach of not weighing myself. But rather going off of how I am feeling.. eg. I can do alot more since I started Zumba. It has helped my back problems immensly. My view is slow and steady. PM me on FB if you wanna talk more gf we could be fit buddies xx

ooh nemesisroxx' post reminded me....

be creative. I love brandy snaps, for example. Could eat them every day and not get bored. But the cream etc is very very calorie dense. So I switch it out for aerosol 'whipped' cream and can have my fave dessert for around 100 calories :)

Similarly - nachos with cheese flavoured crackers (like the peckish ones) and plain yoghurt instead of sour cream.

Salsa as a sauce on a LOT of stuff - virtually no calories and the added bonus of having chilli (fat fighter!)

sandwich sliced bread for toast not toast bread - instant calorie saving.

thicken sauces with chia seeds not flour - fibre and lots of other good stuff for fewer calories.

wraps done in lettuce, not bread.

There are lots of 'diet hacks' to still feel like you're getting your treats and faves in :)

Great thread!! I'm struggling big time as I'm stuck laying on the couch all day most days. I'm not hungry so been having a smoothie in the morning.
I lost 35kgs playing netball, taekwondo and swimming and walking. I did something most days and could almost eat what I wanted Within reason! Now I struggle to walk to the kitchen.
I firmly believe you need to do both. Well for me I had to exercise. Now after 2 spinal surgeries and a bout back in hospital not long ago I just wanna dive into some Whittakers chocolate. I'm lucky I don't go grocery shopping or I'd cavery and eat chocolate all day.

All the medical people around me say you have to eat regular and drink lots of water. Also get activity in even if you park your car further away than next to the door kinda thing. When you want to grab that toast, have a large drink of water first and wait. Think it's meant to make you feel full so you don't want as much??

Anyway good luck xxx

Oooohhhhh great advice from you girls there I knew I could get some good thoughts from here thank you all!  I love that there is a water app Crystal!  I might take you up on that suggestion to be fit buddies!  Ong I also love the advice of drink water before toast and wait.  I even bought a pretty awesome drink bottle to excite my eyes to get me to drink more water but NOPE!  I never knew you could use Chia seeds for thickening sauces Trudi very interesting!  I have Chia seeds for my museli

By the way Ong (farmers wife) I hope your back problems are fixed or eased at least real soon xxx

I'm currently on a no sugar diet with my work and man it is hard! Definitely keep an eye on the sauces that you use in cooking and try to use ones that are under 20g of sugar per 100g (I'm only allowed products under 10g/100g at the moment!)

A big thing with 'low fat' products like yoghurt and dressings and sauces is that to make them taste good the replace the fat with sugar, so your low fat yoghurt goes from 9g per 100g up to 30g per 100g. And I would much rather have a little bit more healthy fat in my diet than more sugar!

If you like your mocha's as much as I do or don't enjoy coffee without added sugar, I've discovered the most amazing thing on earth to make it sweeter. I'm a massive fan of mocha coffees so I put in a teaspoon of the Avalanche stevia sweetened hot chocolate powder. It makes coffee taste sweet and chocolatey again!

I also recommend myfitnesspal. I have lost 10kg since I signed up to it in October last year. I am a regular exerciser/gym goer and after losing some weight throughout last year I hit a wall and was struggling to lose more. I decided I needed to look at what I was eating. I always thought I ate “pretty well” but I signed up to myfitnesspal and it was a bit of an eye opener!  I found that I was eating too many packaged type snacks each day and some of my serving sizes were way too much so I replaced a lot of the packaged stuff and now I eat more fruit instead. MFP is worth checking out and seeing if it works for you, it has helped me moderate what I am eating every day.

I find carbs really play up my craving levels and make me want to eat more. Don't do anything crazy like cutting them completely but maybe try and moderate your intake of them. Also try to be really mindful of your behaviour around food and what outside factors influence your eating habits. So much of our eating can be emotionally driven. I think I got so overweight by not paying attention to my diet and just burying my head in the sand. So my biggest tip is mindfulness!

I hear you its really frustrating but the first thing is you have really got to get your mind into the right space to lose weight.   Having done nearly every diet under the sun as well as fitnesspal you can only succeed if you find that happy place.  I lost over 70kg about 10 years ago because I took diet pills, it totally screwed my health up and now I find it hard to lose any, having gained back that 70 plus more I need to get into the frame of mind too.   I have found that setting up a exercise routine that can be done on auto pilot works, for instance I get up in a zombie state at 5am and do 23-30 minutes 5 times a week on the bike,  I don't realise I have done it until I am standing in the shower afterwards out of breath and all sweaty lol.   Finding little changes makes a huge difference too, for instance I did a spell of trying to go Paleo you know where you give up bread and pasta, it was fine for the first 2 weeks then I had to have carbs I was literally foaming at the mouth for them but now I allow them in moderation with healthier choices such as wheat free pasta and multigrained breads.  Hope you find your own way to a better you, it takes some adjustments and don't beat yourself up when you have a cheat day and end up sat watching a tv marathon with a slab of chocolate you need cheat days just try and have them less frequent =)

When it comes to weight loss the most important aspect is nutrition 100%.  
Start doing things slowly, if you try to do it all at once it becomes unmanageable and really not enjoyable and you find most people tend to fall off and put back any weight they loose and often a bit more.  I work in with my sister who is a personal trainer in providing nutrition advice for the everyday women.  The biggest thing we focus on is just replacing foods with good clean nutrient filled whole foods no crazy diets no calorie counting you really don’t need it (fruits/vegies lean meats etc.) and lots of encouragement and reminders that it probably took them a long time to get to where they are at and it will take just as long to get it off.You just have to keep at it. But slow steady progress means changing lifestyle habits for good and you don’t go on the crazy roller coaster of dropping loads of weight and then it all piling back on.  Quick fixes don’t last (if they did people wouldn’t be continually searching for new ones)  you have to change the root of the problem.  Start slowly and swap foods to include more whole foods in your day drink loads of water (water flushes out toxins and is one of the best things you can do for yourself).  Exercise is important to but do what you can aim to get some form of exercise into most days whatever that may be for you a walk a swim whatever floats your boat ?. A wee motivational tip I saw the other day and really liked.  “if you tripped and fell on the way to work would turn around go home and never return?, of course not, by that logic, one bad day or bine shouldn’t ruin your fitness goals eithers”. 

Seeing as you are rural perhaps you could try a bodyweight circuit a few times a week? You could include burpees, push ups, tricep dips, star jumps, high knee runs, planks etc etc. 

Weight management is such a tricky thing!  I've lost a heap of weight by giving up sugar (not willingly, I went off anything sweet with my last pregnancy and still can't eat it!).  The best thing I've found is not to call it a diet - it's a lifestyle change.  As soon as I started saying diet to myself I felt like I was depriving myself so I'd gorge. 
The other best thing for me was to swap out foods, so instead of eating white toast, I'd get some really yummy whole wheat bread etc.  That way I could still eat it, it was just the better option.

So much good advice here! My advice is totally up the fruit and veggies in your diet so its the bulk of your calorie intake. It's very hard to binge on vegetables! Got that advice from my former flatmate who is now a cardiologist, and it was the only sensible thing he ever said!

two tips from different friends...
One refused to buy chocolate or treats of any kind but bought a large jar of Olives (which she found gross) and everytime she had a craving for a sweet treat she would go to the fridge look at the jar and decide if she really wanted a treat or not... if she did she would eat an olive instead.  Now she loves olives and can't stomach chocolate :/

GF two, suggests giving in to cravings but in moderation (and mentions that you are more likey to overeat avoiding your craving than if you actually ate it) and also if chocolate is your downfall you pop it in the freezer.. then you are only allowed to defrost one at a time and it stops you wanting to eat it because it takes so long :/ or you risk breaking a tooth.

I haven't tried these but hope someone finds them helpful
xx


 

I joined the gym again today! I know my procrastinating, lazy butt won't do enough exercise otherwise despite all intentions to go 'running'- the last few months is evidence of this. So I'm not someone who can be dealing out lifestyle tips I'm afraid.

I do agree with Trudijoy on the awesomeness of my fitness pal, it's a great app. I find when I do use it (I'm a slacker) that I tend to loose weight as it makes you consider what you're eating, which I think is the key. I tend to eat mindlessly, one box of chicken crimpy shapes and boom gone before I know it! But when you have to sit there and take the time to input what you're eating, it makes you consider whether you really REALLY want to eat it. 

I do think that regarding living rural, if you're finding what you're doing exercise-wise isn't enough maybe increase your distance? Living rural can have the advantage of all those hills built in and lovely landscapes which can make a walk more challenging and enjoyable than what you experience in the suburbs. 

Good luck on your journey, we're rooting for you!

On the note of giving in to temptation but in moderation thing, I find this very helpful to not feel like I am giving things in.

I first make sure there is nothing in the house. No chocolates or biscuits etc. That way if I want a sweet treat I can't give in straight away. This is especially good for realising actually I might just be hungry for real food, or need a (non-alcoholic) drink. BUT if I decide I really want something then I have to fit it in my myfitnesspal thing so I might need to do some exercise. Then I make sure I buy it in the smallest size possible, it isn't economical because you get more for your money in the bigger bags (I'm thinking chips here), but if I buy a bigger bag I WILL eat the whole thing.

Hope that helps! I'm really enjoying reading everyones thoughts.

My suggestions are to eat whole real foods and  avoid processed foods. Eat loads of vegetables and keep fruit to about two pieces a day. Most doctors and dieticians recommend the restriction  of fruit consumption when trying to lose weight or in the case of diabetes. The World Health Organisation has released new guidelines for sugar consumption to less than 10% of daily total energy intake! with 5% of daily total energy intake being more healthful. That works out to be approximately 6 teaspoons per day for women. That is not a lot of sugar, so unless you eat whole real foods predominantly you will need to read labels to avoid hidden sugars - sugar is in almost everything and can be called a variety of things. Reducing your sugar intake will help you lose weight without a lot of effort. Cutting out all added sugars can dramatically reduce unwanted body weight. The initial few weeks of sugar reduction can be a bit uncomfortable, but after this hurdle, you will find you have little craving for sweet food which helps avoid those foods which are detrimental to achieving your weight goals.
Having some  protein with each meal will help keep your appetite satisified and if you are avoiding processed foods, and eating whole real foods,  then the natural fats in real foods are beneficial and also help with satiety. 
Exercise will help with weight goals, but to be honest, you cannot out exercise a bad diet.
If you haven't exercised for awhile, choose something you like to do and start slowly, but do it regularly. Consistency is better than ad hoc all out one day then nothing for a week.
I think it is more realistic to make changes slowly and to not beat yourself up if you slip up. Put it aside and  just get back on track at the next meal or exercise session.  One slip up won't sabotage your whole effort, but giving up will. 
Good luck, I'm sure that you will find what works for you and will adhesive the goal you set for yourself.
 

I forgot to add to that long preachy saga, that I follow a Paleo template eating philosophy and manage to keep myself pretty lean and weight stable even after having four kids and then later on the rotten mid life hormonal changes where most women put on a lot of weight.

I've been trying to go more paleo lately and not eat carbs like I used to. I think I have a bit of an intollerance to bread because I feel so bloated afterwards. I've felt better since switching and although I haven't weighed myself since I did the switch I know I've lost some weight.

I buy the low fat Greek acidophilus yogurt that you make yourself, lots of (unsweatened) muesli and nuts and seeds with dried cranberries for breakfast and any other meal if I can't be bothered to cook It's working for me but I do take supplements to make sure I'm getting the right nutrients per day etc.

Some people think I'm lucky when it comes to weight because they see me eat once a week and I'll eat as much as I want and I'm fairly slim. But what they don't see is me eating brown rice six days a week sometimes twice a day or more and loads of veggies and some meat and fruit. I'm lucky that I never liked carbonated drinks but that's pretty much it as far as luck goes. I wish I had more money to eat healthier and more tasty since my diet is tailored to my budget and my budget is a shoestring. If you really love bread I would suggest you invest in a cookbook with good gluten-free bread receipes and possibly a bread maker. It might be an initial cost but if you love it that much and are going to eat it every day, it makes sense to invest in one and then you can have it every day without the worry. Luckily you love vegemite so that's healthy.

I took all your lovely ladies suggestions in to consideration and tailored my own lifestyle change to suit me and my time and budget.  I am happy to say make that ecstatic to say that 1kg in the last week has gone and I know it's because of the small changes I have made from the advice from here.  I thank you all so much xx