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The Beauty Vault - Aug
The Beauty Vault - Aug

The Worst Things That Can Happen During Your Beauty Routine!

5 July, 2018 - 09:50pm by - Head Pixie | 24 Comments

By BR Tabatha

There's much to love about a good beauty ritual. The way your skin feels soft and clean post-facial. Running your hands over silky-smooth skin after a wax. Looking into a mirror and seeing impossibly long lashes after you've curled your lashes, added falsies, then applied mascara. Good times.

Then there are the not so good times. The times when you wonder why you go to the effort to beautify yourself only to endure pain, embarassment, and sometimes bruises and scabs. 

So, what are the horrific beauty moments we pray to never repeat? Check these out... and prepare to cringe.

The razor slice. Perhaps you're shaving while daydreaming, perhaps your razor's a little on the old side, perhaps you slipped in the shower... No matter how it happened there's no denying the pain and ugh-ness of seeing a good inch of skin peeled away to reveal red, rawness, that will scab over and take its sweet time healing.

Hair colour that's not to dye for. 'I'll colour my hair,' you think. You buy your box dye. You take it home. Get things under way, and then you find yourself sitting butt nekid in the bathroom with only a towel around your shoulders, plastic wrap in your hair, and your scalp starts to burn. Burn. Burn some more. No pretty hair colour is worth that kind of pain, so in the shower you jump and down the drain the dye runs.

The evil epilator. Who are you people who can handle the pain of epilation? How do you handle the pain of epilation? Having hair after hair ripped from one's leg is agony. Agony! 

Ban the brush! Who knew a basic hair brush could be an instrument of torture? The long-haired folk who've used one only to have it tangle in their hair, then had to grit their teeth in pain while trying to pull, yank, twist and turn the heck out of it, all the while wondering if large clumps are being torn from their scalp, that's who. Thank goodness for kind and caring brushes, like the Mita TanglePRO - innovation is a beautiful thing.

The depilatory cream - it burns. A BR Kellie story that has imprinted itself in our heads is the story of her attempt at using depilatory cream on her armpits. Slather it on, she did. Sit back and relax, she did. Feel the fiery burn, she did. Whip it off, she did. Spend the night with cold flannels under her armpits, and the next day unable to lower her arms due to the bulging inflammation, she did. There's a reason they say to patch test first.

When wands attack. Applying mascara appears to be an innocuous job. Remove wand from tube, swipe it on lashes, go about your day. All fun and games until you sneeze mid-swipe or find yourself distracted, and next thing you know you've stabbed yourself in the eye and the world's gone a blurry shade of black. 

The cruelty of curling tongs. There's nothing like a bouncy head of Victoria's Secret model-eque hair. So beachy, so alluring, so fun and free. You know what won't put a bounce in your step? The moment the curling tong magically attaches itself to some part of your face or the back of your neck and sizzles your skin.

Speaking of sizzling... My ears are burning. There's nothing like straightening your hair for a salon chic look. Except for when it clips the top of your ear, sending a bolt of pain through you. The only thing worse? It's done by your hairdresser and instead of swearing black and blue you have to smile sweetly and proclaim 'it's fine, doesn't hurt at all' because you're hardly going to tell the truth least you annoy them by telling the blatant truth and find your ear repeatedly clamped by accident, or straight out sizzled off.

Time to toss out the tweezers? Tweezing eyebrow hairs, nose hairs and random body hairs can feel a little dangerous at the best of times, but it's even more so when your tweezers are at the end of their life, blunt as anything, and you have to snatch repeatedly at hairs in order to grip and rip them, which can lead to skin being gripped and ripped instead. Ow.

Pucker up and say bruise. The things we lasses will do for bigger lips. Suctioning our smackers into a glass or piece of plastic to get that bee stung look is a thing, and so are the painful bruises that result. A bad look, a bad feel, just bad all over.

Whoever said beauty was pain was correct. Some of the time. Thankfully all the good parts of beautifying oneself makes up for those traumatic moments. Mostly. So my beauties... are you prone to beauty boo-boos? Have any of the above happened to you? What's your most terrifying beauty ritual experience? Chat away!

Comments

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4th August, 2018

Probably losing too much hair after a mornings’ brush... knowing i don’t have a lot to spare on my small head... who knows when I’ll start going bald. That’s one thing that keeps me worried time to time.

3rd August, 2018

Having a wax strip or anything else sticky sticking somewhere it's not meant to go.

9th July, 2018

The mascara wand attack is the worst.

9th July, 2018

Embarrassingly enough - I have done most of these. My absolute worst experience was about 12 years ago, when the first freely available range of ‘warms in your hands’ wax strips came out. I bought them, I warmed them, I applied them to my bikini line, I couldn’t get them off. Talk about bruising! I thought a hot bath would fix it, the wax would dissolve right? No. Not right. Not right at all. I stuck to the base of the bath. I had to yell out to my flat mate to bring me some scissors. It was not beauty at home in the least.

8th July, 2018

What about the home wax kits that don’t have a temperature on them I burnt my legs with wax that was too hot

8th July, 2018

Yep epilator pain all the time when I am brave enough to use it :(

7th July, 2018

All of the above, except for the hair dye, I haven't felt the burn with a boxed dye and I've never used an epilator or those lip suctioning things.

7th July, 2018

Liquid eyeliner in the eye stings, so I try not to rush that, and never be in a rush to 'ladyscape', because razor burn is not cool there!

7th July, 2018

Oh ouch yes - the blade situation so many times lol. The burning of the hair dye and the depilatory cream omg the pain.

7th July, 2018

Tweezers! Makes my cry every time

7th July, 2018

Oh yeah, I’ve had my share of beauty boo boos. In my early days of home hair dying, I created orange/ginger highlights for myself instead of blonde, and wound up getting called a ‘carrot top’ at school (am cringing now thinking about it!). Not that I’m ginger-bashing here - Prince Harry is cute & some people really suit that colour - but when a hair colour doesn’t suit you, it can be pretty crap and bring out all the worst qualities in one’s face! Lol. Also I’ve done the razor slice, before a hot date, wound up with blood everywhere and a scar on my leg 20 years later. Good times! The pain we go through in the name of beauty!

6th July, 2018

The razor slice ... the worst one happened in my teens. I was sitting in the bath shaving my legs, and for some unknown reason, instead of passing the razor from one hand to the other above my legs, I did it behind my leg, and sliced the vein-rich skin behind my knee so badly that there was a tatty strip of hanging skin. It stung like crazy and bled for around 15 minutes (even while sitting with my leg up on the side of the bath to get my knee higher than my heart, and putting pressure on the wound with a clean wash cloth). My teenage self seriously thought I was going to bleed to death!

6th July, 2018

Hahaha oh my gosh so many of these are making me cringe, especially when I got to the mascara one, the worst is when you poke yourself in the eye! Also I couldn't even count how many times I've burnt my arms with the bloody curling wand! ouuuch

6th July, 2018

I actually prefer to epilate my legs instead of shave them. If I shave them they become cactus pretty fast. The main torture I do to myself is the peels because I love the smooth skin so I'm willing to deal with the prickling for the better part of an hour for that.

6th July, 2018

Personally I've always find eyelash curlers terrifying. So I never use them even if they will make my lashes look nicer.