so for me, i've spent (wasted!) years mired in self doubt and self hate. I'm not pretty, i'm not thin enough, etc etc etc
I lost 30kg and then put some back on and finally - at the ripe old age of 36, i don't care. I care about celebrating and enhancing what i got, but for me, rather than what other people think. Although it's nice to be complimented! :D Even with compliments, I used to negate them and now I can just smile and say thanks.
We've talked about this kinda thing on here before but I wondered what your catalyst was for just learning to love you as you.
I think for me it was part going through significant trauma and realising that at the end of the day you look how you look and it won't stop life catching up with you in the end. People were there for me regardless of whether i was pretty, my eyeliner was on point, i was at goal weight or whatever. So my value as a person started to rise in my own eyes.
I still don't think I'm that pretty and I know I'm not ever going to be super skinny, but honestly, I like myself more now than ever just because I know i'm just me and I'm enough.
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acceptance of your appearance - what's the catalyst?
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Gosh Trudi, I hear you! I think I came to that realisation a few years ago. I cant quite recall exactly when but I am who I am and so be it. I think maybe it is an age thing? I just got to the stage where I thought there are bigger battles to fight and win. I will never be the pretty one, or the thin one, but I am me, and I am the best me I can be. I wopuld love the young ones to know this.
I feel that when I entered my late 20's and early 30's is when I have accepted my appearance. I no longer spend hours or lose sleep in planning what I am going to wear for a special ocassion or something. I think that it is when you already have your style and you are already know what to wear and when to wear it.
I say I don't care what others think of me but really I do at times. I don't know if I have reached where you ladies have yet but I do hope to. I think I have definitely learned that people are gunna always have something to say about you no matter what so I decided that I will be however and whoever I want to be. In the small town I live in people are very sheltered when it comes to fashion or individualism. I tore that box up a long time ago and get so many unkind comments. I figure though that it's their problem not mine, so I will keep my alternative style and be happy with it. Body image however is a different thing for me. I haven't gotten to that acceptance place yet but am learning day by day to appreciate it.
This is probably the best I've ever felt physically. I'm at my fittest I've ever been in my life. I've lost 19 kg from January when I started. The exercise has made me happier . I really enjoy it.
I used to take what people said to heart. But I think now I've grown a thicker skin and can bounce back from it better than I would of in the past. I think I'm more confident than I was 10 years ago. I'd go out with full face and falsies and not care. I get side looks but I've stopped caring what they think and just smile back .
I used to take what people said to heart. But I think now I've grown a thicker skin and can bounce back from it better than I would of in the past. I think I'm more confident than I was 10 years ago. I'd go out with full face and falsies and not care. I get side looks but I've stopped caring what they think and just smile back .
It's weird though, isn't it? I don't go around criticising what other people look like, although I do appreciate it and comment when people have made an effort to look good, so why do I think anyone cares what I look like??? (that's a rhetorical question - my parents were both very good looking and shallow and had hangups about weight, so that's the garbage I listened to all through my childhood!). I really hope I never sent any of those messages to my children.
Good topic Trudi! For me self acceptance came when I had my first child but I was truly happy after my second. I had changed in so many different areas. Physically and mentally. For so long I battled with how I looked afterwards. Weight gain and stretch marks. I feared people could see them from the outside.
Funnily enough I wore a bikini one day after having my first child and a comment made about my 'marks' struck a cord with me (not a negative one). I realised my body carried and made a human. With that I grew to like the way I am. Yeah I carry on about my weight but I know Im the only one that can change that.
My confidence really grew when I found love for makeup! I really think if people judge based on what one looks like they are the one with the issue xx
People that are valuable are the ones that love and appreciate you for you not for what you wear or look like xx
Funnily enough I wore a bikini one day after having my first child and a comment made about my 'marks' struck a cord with me (not a negative one). I realised my body carried and made a human. With that I grew to like the way I am. Yeah I carry on about my weight but I know Im the only one that can change that.
My confidence really grew when I found love for makeup! I really think if people judge based on what one looks like they are the one with the issue xx
People that are valuable are the ones that love and appreciate you for you not for what you wear or look like xx
I used to suffer from really bad anxiety and for 2 years hardly went out in public. I was so concerned that people were looking at me and saying terrible things when in all honesty they probably weren't.
I am 35 now and I am at the stage in my life where I really don't care what others think. I am far from perfect but life is good and I am happy.
A beautiful heart and soul is far superior than anything else. Be who you are and stand proud.
I am 35 now and I am at the stage in my life where I really don't care what others think. I am far from perfect but life is good and I am happy.
A beautiful heart and soul is far superior than anything else. Be who you are and stand proud.
I believe as you get a bit older you realise there are so many other things that make a person -Look at your best friends -they are not all beautiful and often just shime from within. I have learned to look at what I have to be happy with and make the most of who I am and to try to be a nicer person rather than focusing on things I can't change.
I find my body acceptance gets a boost every time I do something physically challenging, like Oxfam Trailwalker, climbing a mountain, or giving birth. Those things remind me how amazing my body is, and how what it looks like matter 0%. These days I definitely worry more about my health and strength than how pretty or skinny I look.
Wow, this is an interesting thread. I am 27 years young and have had weight issues for most of my life. I find I don't stick with diets or exercise fads very long, and always revert back to my old habits. In saying that, I feel like every time I try a new "regime", one thing will stick with me. And for now, that is the best I can do. I like to think I can accept what I look like but am still heavily judgemental about my size regardless of the fact no one has a problem or has said anything to me. I am my own harshest critic.
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